NeverEndgStory

Starr Trekk: The Never Ending Frontier

WASHINGTON (AP) -- Indep

Two more years but who's counting?
Charles Bakaly, Kenneth, I-Dont-Do-The- Talk-Show-Circuit, Starr's press agent:	Handling the on-going criminal cases generated by the investigations that failed to implicate the president in any wrong-doings & writing a final report will take Counsel Kenneth Starr & his hordes of experts at least two more years to finish.
	Bull Dog Starr will never say that prosecution of the president can be ruled out.

Make no mistake about it This Investigation is BIGGER than the president
	Possible planned diversions of more of the time & money resources the Starr Chamber intends to spend
Keep investigating the president, as always, &
	Pursue yet another criminal case brought against Webster Hubbell
	Pursue a third case against Susan McDougal
not mentioned but always there	Threatening Julie Steele with perjury & obstruction charges & maybe pursuing those charges
not mentioned but always there	& more to be announced, as always

& Don't Forget Wiley!
	Time & money to see if we can get some evidence that we can interpret to support our already concluded conclusion and to try and insure that
No one corrects their story in a way that challenges our already concluded conclusions unless we can talk someone into believing there must be some kind of conspiracy, bribery, etc. going on if anyone contradicts us.
Money & Time for another Grand Jury:	Investigate land developer & Democratic fund-raiser to see if we can make you think he bribed Wiley to change her story.
Time & Money for more investigatory & legal actions:	To see if we can break Julie & get her to support the story that we like but is not longer supported by any of our other three potential witnesses. Well, maybe Isikoff can help us out again.
Keeping Gossip Alive
Even if Wiley wasn't groped, if we keep bringing it up & say that it's true & if we keep slandering & persecuting witnesses who don't support us, we think we might still be able to convince you this "dastardly deed" happened, & if not, we can still keep the gossip alive this way.
Possibly lotsa money on Nathan Landow	He shows great promise for keeping our office alive and gobbling up the citizens' money.
	Land-developers provide us with fertile fields to investigate & keep investigating.
	Democratic fund-raisers are certainly some of our favorite targets.
	He knew Wiley! Well, that's enough proof for us.
		He knew Wiley
		He appears to like the president
		Voila! He must have tried to influence or discourage her to change her testimony against the president.
We now know that the Starr Investigator is an expert at making direct associations into fifth or sixth times removed associations, & vice versa.
	First generation partner becomes a fifth or six-times removed distant cousin
	Direct discussions with the IWF (not to mention dinners with Barbara) and discussions with Jones' attorneys become cousins five times removed.
	Julie through Wiley to The President who she's never met and possibly as a Republican never even voted for becomes a prime time culprit because she must have an intense, immediate connection with the President or his dastardly agents or else she would tell The Inquisitors what they want to hear.
	Sarah, a son, an 80 year old grandmother somehow become intrinsically entangled in The President and The First Lady's imagined wrong-doings.
What's good for the gander will never be good for the goose in this inquisition. I mean that in a gender-neutral way, of course.

Two Years & Beyond The Next Frontier
	Starr will, of course, not rule out criminally prosecuting the president once he leaves office.
Final reports can take forever.
	Starr doesn't want to miss the opportunity to Get Gore, Too.

Woops	Starr Boy Toys Sex Charges Julie Byron Poetry TOC
That pesky Maryland prosecutor just doesn't seem to understand what side his bread is buttered on. Although imitation may be the greatest form of flattery, this is not what we meant by doing our prosecutorial duty....

Meanwhile, there is a Maryland grand jury investigating whether Linda Tripp investigated by a grand jury. Her illegally taped phone conversations that have been such a delicious source of "evidence" for us are being investigated. They have had the nerve to subpoena one of her neighbors to turn over any tapes given to her "to keep." Woops, will people begin to figure out that Tripp was part of the springing the hiding-the-gift trap, too?

1998 November 26th